Dating religious girls

In this article I am going to call it “dating” and define it as “the process of finding a spouse.” I do not claim to be an expert: I realize that many varying opinions about dating float around Christian circles jumping over each other, getting mixed together, and consuming some people. You wish it could happen soon but it completely freaks you out. Some people call this dating, other people call it courting — there are likely countless terms you could use for the process.I also always hear girls saying things like, “I want a man to pursue me.” Well, that’s swell. Except that the girls spouting this line are then the same girls who sit on the sidelines and don’t do anything while expecting to get a date. I mean smile, be interested, be interesting, ask questions, touch his shoulder, laugh at his jokes. There is also a camp among Christians who fear dating.They think it will turn into a tempting situation (which it could), or that God hasn’t “called” them to date anyone (which may be true).Feel free to interact with those of the opposite gender.It is not inappropriate; talking to someone does not mean you have a “crush on them” nor does it mean they have one on you. You do not need to flirt in order to have fun with those of the other sex.You wouldn’t want to marry a kook like that anyway. All too often, believers over-spiritualize dating and try turning it into some kind of holy act.

Remember, more than likely they have dated at least once before.I mean, I don’t know many Christians who actually enjoy dating. Go to parties, hang out with friends in group settings, get to know other single people.They are so focused on “finding the right one” and “hearing from God” and looking out for “lightning in the sky” that they suck all the fun out of it. Why is it that so many single Christians turn dating into some kind of checklist and interviewing process? Here’s a tip girls: if you have a checklist, look it over, count up all those necessary character traits, then crumple it up and chuck it in the trash bin—’cause that’s where it belongs. He cares about your holiness and whichever man can help grow you in the holiness department will be on God’s list. And here’s a scandalous idea that I’m sure someone will disagree with, but oh well: I don’t mean wear a push-up bra and sit on his lap.Editor’s Note: I almost re-titled Nicole’s post, “How To Get A Guy.” So much of our single and dating conversations revolve around being content on our own, but it’s also necessary that we start a conversation on the way to date.Today’s post is written by Nicole Cottrell over at Modern Reject. This post could go into a million different directions.

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